Archive for the 'rechercherait du temps perdu' Category

mockumentary.
This kind of thing always occupied me when installing myself at an infinite small not yet become garden in the Westside part of my house while smoking:
I remembered I read one’s palm almost a year ago, actually one of my oldest method of cruising and to get laid, and pronounced to him that he’s a [...]


I always thought that my trip to Manila was might be an ease for personal grief. Grief, what a word! I actually accept this term to define my feeling toward (my relationship with) you yesterday. It was the time when I realized how much I strayed myself of experiencing this again.
But we are ruled by [...]


Malam tadi, saya dan dua orang teman dengan reputasi sama sebagai “old bitch on the block” bertukar cerita tentang makanan dan halhal seputar itu sambil mengitari hidangan mewah kami : babi merah, ayam goring bumbu wijen dan tahu siram tauco.
Satu bercerita bagaimana dia benci sekali makanan dingin, tapi dalam kondisi ingin segera kembali ke Indonesia [...]


june 16th

16Jun09

Seseorang mencolek saya di pinggir panggung rock klasik untuk meminjam korek, dan mengembalikannya dengan senyum dan mulut yang membentuk ucapan “thanx”.
Saya melambai memberi gestur “you’re welcome” dan membantin “manis eh! Kok gak pernah liat ya di jogja?!”
Tak sampai setengah lagu, si peminjam korek mencolek saya :
“you speak english?”
“fluently”
“what do you think of the band?”
“i’m not [...]


Rasanya, kemarin saya diajarkan beda yang mendasar antara ditolak dan tertolak.
Ditolak,  adalah pernyataan negatif atas hal yang diajukan. Tertolak,  adalah penolakkan menyeluruh atas eksistensi.
Kemarin, saya merasa tertolak dengan telak.
Dan yang tersisa tinggalah, agoni.
and when is the next lesson?  tomorrow.  (the piano-1993)


seandainya saya belum menulis surat “last but not least“  itu, saya akan menulis lirik lagu ini sebagai gantinya. seandainya saya tidak pernah menyanyikan “dont’t think twice, it’s allright!“,  rasanya lebih merdu menirukan suara serak tom waits ini.
You can never hold back spring
You can be sure that I will never
Stop believing
The blushing rose will climb
Spring ahead [...]


Well it’s been a long time, long time now
since I’ve seen you smile.
And I’ll gamble away my fright.
And I’ll gamble away my time.
And in a year, a year or so
this will slip into the sea
Well, it’s been a long time, long time now
since I’ve seen you smile
Nobody raise your voices
Just another night in Nantes
Ah non, [...]


dear C,
Berlin is where i am now and survived from the big freezer called Canada, though! after montreal, every places are tropic now  in the bomb joke-bus, we were making joke that this is a conspiracy for makes me step in tim hourtons
talking about steps, yeah…i feel this journey makes me go into [...]


Saya membungkus diri rapatrapat, di tikungan depan kami akan berhenti, membuka bagasi, sedikit kata dan saya tidak akan pernah melihatnya lagi.

Saya membungkus diri rapatrapat, dingin malam ini tidak ingin saya ingat lagi, sampai kapanpun.

Saya membungkus diri rapatrapat, jangan sampai kulit kami bersentuhan. Jangan sampai baunya menempel di tubuh saya.
Saya tidak [...]


Dear C,
That’s how I start a “not so cheerful” letter, usually. I think I kind of miss your letter lately. Or it is simply the story you’ve thrown in it. I also found that deep in me, I feel that this correspondences do affected and worst, addictive. It gives me a sense of insecurity, somehow. [...]